Parental Filter

You know very well that your children will not remain children forever and will come a time when they become young adults who are ready to leave home and live by themselves. This life-altering event causes what is known as the "empty nest syndrome" from which many moms ( and sometimes even the fathers )suffer after their offsprings leaving home .How do you deal or will deal with that ?

I find it very hard to imagine what it will be like - my children are only toddlers at the moment. I think that I would probably do a course or a job outside of the home in order to give me something new to think about. I think that there are too many people who live their lives through their children and perhaps they should do more things for themselves once their children leave home.

I have no idea how I would deal with that, my children are still very young so I'm not yet very concerned in regards to that at the moment.
From my point of view right now, I doubt I'd see it more of a negative than a positive. I am thinking that I will be happy for her, that she is apparently rooted enough to be able to start an independent life of her own. Not every one moves out of their parents' house, there are 30-year-olds everywhere in the world living in their parents' basements, drinking beer. I would see myself as a very lucky parent for raising such a well-rounded young person who is absolutely capable of facing the world and standing on her own two feet.

Although I would miss her like crazy, I would still be very proud and happy for her.

I agree with you - it will be great, in a way, to see them standing on their own two feet. However, I want to make it clear that they can always return if they want to. I know that my in-laws make it pretty clear that they do not wants their sons back home (although they would let them if they asked). I would feel comfortable going to my parents in a way but on the other hand I feel like I shoudl be standing on my own feet and no longer relying on them.

Yes, with the way I raise my kids, I would hope that they would want to visit often once they're on their own. On the other hand, while they're away, there is no need to sulk. There are lots of activities I would want to explore, I don't want to spend my days feeling sorry for myself.

This is something that you should be aware of, but in my case my teens became steadily more independent then they went off to university. This makes it easier because they are gone then they are back (with laundry) then gone again. It is always lovely to have them at home but you take more and more pleasure in having the house to yourself again.

When our kids "left the nest", my husband and I had a little taste of what life was like before the kids, and we really were enjoying it. A bit after that, everyone left the town we were living in, and all having great adventures. We were very proud of our kids and looked forward to their next achievement.
I think I began to feel proper empty next syndrome when they began to have babies. I suddenly had such a craving to hold a baby in my arms.

I think for some couples there is a danger that without noticing it they have grown apart and only the children and the family activities hold them together. It will be very hard for them when the nest is empty.

This sounds logical, yes. It's like every activity, every trip, everything that was done for years involved or was for the children somehow... and then suddenly there's nothing to be done for the kids any longer and people get "lost."

I think it is important to give time and attention to your relationship as a couple and well as to responsibilities to your family. Of course we all know that it is easier said than done!