My son married a young woman with a 2 year old and they have a one year old together. What amazes me is how much my son seems to "suddenly" know about raising children. Do any other grandparents have this problem?

I don't see it as a problem.

No one starts out knowing everything that experience can teach but they DO know their limits. Sometimes that is all it takes to be an effective parent.

What problem are you having with it?

Please don't take this the wrong way but are you maybe feeling this way because he isn't taking advice that you may give him? The only reason I ask this is because my mother in law would get really upset with us if we chose a different way of parenting concerning certain issues. Please don't think that I am saying that is the problem just asking if maybe that could be part of it?

Yes this is normal for every new parent to have the impression that he knows everything related to his child. One reason is because being the first children he wants to devote himself completely to educating the child. Another reason is that everyone has been a child and know what an education he would like to have received.

My guess would be that your son doesn't think he knows it all but is trying very hard to find his niche as a parent and has done the research to parent as he and his partner wish to. It's very hard as a new parent to have so many people offering up what worked for them or what they think you should do or do differently. I know that when I had my first child I felt inadequate every time someone questioned my methods.

That's exactly the way I felt when someone would offer advice that I hadn't asked for. They were only trying to be helpful but it made me start second guessing myself as a parent.

Grandparents don't know it all either. Your son probably resents the fact you are trying to tell him how to raise his own children. You probably made mistakes too while raising him. If he asks for advice then it is yours to give but you should never offer it unsoliciited. No parent wants to be told how to raise their child.

Originally Posted by Terri_R

My son married a young woman with a 2 year old and they have a one year old together. What amazes me is how much my son seems to "suddenly" know about raising children. Do any other grandparents have this problem?

There is nothing to be worried and to be amazed. people learn as the time come and situation comes infront of them. what you do is, help them, give advice. its upon them, weather to take or not.

I'd have to agree with ColeCash here, grandparents don't know it all either. I have had experience with in-laws who kept telling me what to do with my children and it drove me totally nuts. I disagreed in a lot of things they were teaching me and I wanted to raise my kids the way I felt was right. We might be new parents, but we would never put our child in harm's way and usually we are always doing our best to be better parents than everyone else.

Sometimes, grandparents can get a little "in-the-way" when their kids are trying to raise their own children, and I'm not necessarily saying that there's anything wrong with that, but sometimes it is better not to offer unsolicited advice especially if you tend to do it all the time.

Your children have their own idea of how they want their family to be, and how they want their own kids to be raised, give them a chance to follow their own instinct at this because they are their kids' parents and a parent always knows best.