Well, speaking as a grandmother my perspective has definitely changed from my time as a mother of young children. I have learned many things and the most important is that with children you must pick your battles wisely. You didn't say what type of advice grandma is trying to give but maybe she is actually trying to pass on a little wisdom from the mistakes she may have made.

You can ignore her or simply say, "Thanks for your input, hubby and I will do what we think is best." If she's reaaaaally pushy you guys might want to sit her down and let her know that you appreciate her advice but you have confidence in your own parenting skills and wish she would simply enjoy the grandchildren.

You have to let her know that you will not tolerate her telling you how to raise your children. By telling you how to raise your children she has shown a complete lack of manners so you do not need to worry about being rude to her.

Well, i think grandparents are good with their advice. what we feel odd is because of timegap between their age and ours. but believe me, advice taken from old age people are more better than reading books.

Originally Posted by Terri_R

I have learned many things and the most important is that with children you must pick your battles wisely. You didn't say what type of advice grandma is trying to give but maybe she is actually trying to pass on a little wisdom from the mistakes she may have made.

I think this is a very valid point. A lot of times, new parents get very touchy about people "trying to take over raising the children" when all they're truly trying to do is pass on some things they learned while they still can.

Usually they are just trying to help. If it is a control issue then I would have hubby talk to her. In a non confrontational way and not during an argument. Maybe have him go to her place, alone, and talk to her.

I can see both sides of this issue and I have a feeling I might would be giving my husband a bit more advices then he will care for. I have a lot of experience with babies and children and he has barly touched a baby.

I am aware of this though and I will try very hard to step back and let him find his way. I think that is what grandparents need to do too. Yes they have knowledge and experience but now its their children's turn to gain this knowledge and experience and they will do this best if you let them try.

I do have a mother in law who is overbearing when it comes to advise. It is more in the way she offers it. She has this knack of saying it in a belittling way. I just feel that advise can be offered but not everyday and try to wait until it is asked for.

Fortunately, you and your husband are on the same page here, and it is good for him to do the confrontation, even if it does turn into a fight sometimes.